my friend who snorts cocaine won’t eat cookie dough because it’s bad for you
YOU KNOW WHATS HORRIBLE, WHEN YOU HAVE A CRUSH. NOT A FUCKING “OOH ID PUT MY CHIP IN THEIR DIP” BUT A FUCKING CRUSH THATS SO STRONG THAT YOU CAN IMAGINE THEM HUGGING YOU FROM BEHIND, AND PUTTING THEIR FACE TO YOUR BACK OR NECK. THEIR LITTLE SLEEP SOUNDS AND THEIR DISGUSTING MORNING BREATH THAT YOU DON’T MIND BECAUSE YOUR CRUSH IS THAT FUCKING STRONG
there’s a ten year old boy in my high school honors math class who speaks six different languages.you shitheads think im fucking with you look at this little genius.like what even look at him discussing with our teacher and shit she has more respect for that child than me im so jealous of his like everything. are you smarter than a fifth grader? no I’m fucking not.
I have a very big crush on u but sadly I am only a little bug and u are a garden
that was adorable and heart breaking
in my senior drama class i had to play gordon ramsay for a film project but we could only film in school so we had to try to find a closed off room to use. the thing is the room wasn’t exactly soundproof and apparently someone heard us and that’s the story of how the vice principal and four freshmen walked in on me wearing a chef’s hat and yelling at my friend because her squid was so raw i could still hear it telling spongebob to fuck off